2010

Though we are only 8 months into this year, it just seems like it has blown by.
I have been through way more in the last couple of years, than I ever thought I would.
At this point in my life, I have hit a sort of bottom. My relationship has failed, I have no job, and in a couple of weeks, I need to be out of my house.
It all just seems so hopeless. I have distanced myself from all my friends, and church family, whom I love dearly.
Why? Because I have always been the type of person that thought, it would just be better for me to disappear, than to know that I'm a burden on someone else. I have had many who wonder, "has she gone off the deep end?", "Is she living a lifestyle we don't know about?", " is she trying to escape her circumstances by getting caught up in the world?". I've heard it all.
The answer to all of those questions is no.
Even though not a day goes by where my heart doesn't ache because of the horror of a splitting family, or I don't cry myself to sleep thinking of my beautiful children, and the lack of security they must feel.
I know I have Jesus. He has and always will be, the only reason I get through anything in this life. I don't have any of the answers for any of the things I have had to deal with, except that I know God wants me to use these experiences as a way of helping other people.
That's all I want. Is to know that the lessons learned were not in vain.

Brandi -

Well my birthday is around the corner, the big 3-0! Can you believe it??!! I can't! I'm going to be 30 years old. I'm trying to plan two things, a night out with the girls, you know a little dinner...some dancing! And a day out of town for myself, a bit of a renewal if you will. I was thinking the Keys, but a good friend of mine gave a little scare when she told me about a poisonous fish in the waters. I still think I'm going though, I'm a Florida girl, I love me some beach! I'm excited to just unwind, do some sightseeing, shopping, and check out the local night life. Yay! I'm excited just thinking about it! Happy birthday to me!!

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Good Day

Today was a good day for a few reasons. The first being that I got to spend the entire day with my Bean who wasn't feeling too well last night and this morning, and the other reason is I was able to pick up Amiyah early from the sitter and spend quality time with her as well. A lot of changes have been made in my life, but the one thing that always remains the same, the unconditional love my children give me each day. I'm such a blessed woman.


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